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 The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]

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PostSubject: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Feb 29, 2012 6:20 am

((Mostly Tseng/Reno, but open to other participants - just jump in!))


It was an ordinary afternoon, of an ordinary day... and due to this large amount of ordinary, Reno was bored.

His feet were comfortably resting atop his desk, mp3 player blasting music into his ears, one finger idly tapping out his report in time to the beat. It wasn't the most productive way to do things, but was at least the more entertaining option when compared to sitting properly, in silence and typing until either your fingers were worn down to useless stubs or your eyes bled from over-exposure to the LCD screen.

The batteries ran down before the report was done, an exasperated sigh echoing around the newly discovered silence of the ShinRa building. His legs swung down from the desk, narrowly missing a precariously perched mug of coffee, and firmly planted themselves on the floor as he dove - almost head first - into his draws in search for the packet of cigarettes he knew were hidden in there somewhere.

Somewhere amongst the rubber bands, paper clips, half used tubes of glue, a ball of used sticky tape?!

Eventually his hand emerged clasped around a worse-for-wear packet, and with a slight bounce in his step he head out of his office and towards the TURK Lounge - a small break room of magnificent wonders, bent and broken rules.

At any given time in the TURK lounge you would find bottles of alcohol, expensive coffee, illegal substances (confiscated, obviously, not used... much) and something mouldy that might have once been a pizza, but no one really has a clue or wants to find out.

It was also the one room where he could smoke without as many consequences as in his office (docked pay, extra paperwork, an ass kicking from Tseng), and it was a good deal warmer than the sub zero temperatures of Midgar in the winter.

He settled back on the sofa and dragged a half empty mug of coffee over to use as an ashtray, lazily blowing smoke rings at the ceiling and wondering how to sneak out of the office early this time.

The ceiling escape route was out after Tseng fumigated for "mice" and nearly killed him....
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Thu Mar 01, 2012 1:24 am

Tseng sighed softly and rubbed his eyes, taking a break from starting at his screen. Today seemed to be a day of very ending reports to be typed up.. and he had a feeling he'd probably be yelling at Reno soon enough for probably not finishing up his own reports.
Leaning back in his chair he sighed as he stared at the ceiling, then frowned when his stomach made a loud rumble. It hasn't been that long since I ate.. he thought, glancing at the clock and blinking. When did it get so late? Standing up he left his office, not surprised to see Reno was absent from his desk, and headed for the Turk lounge.

The smell of smoke hit him as he entered the room and he chose to ignore it, as well as the red head he knew was causing it, voting instead to head over to one of the locked cupboards and pulling out a key.. not that locks really stop Turks. Unlocking it be pulled out a packet of chocolate biscuits and a mug, you don't really want to trust the general mugs here after all. Tseng then when to make himself the coffee he needed, all the while ignore Reno who he just knew was watching him.

Reno had been watching Tseng a lot more lately, more than was deemed necessary for their job description.. and it irked him, he didn't know why it did, it just did.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Thu Mar 01, 2012 1:41 am

While admittedly his gaze had flickered towards Tseng, Reno had more of a control on it today, whatever "it" was.

He closed his eyes and leant back into the sofa more, listening to Tseng's near silent movements around the lounge, the lock clicking and the rustle of the biscuit packet. He'd often wanted to break into the small cupboard the Director kept for himself, but the consequences of eating the boss' food was more severe than even he wanted to test out.

He gave a quiet grunt as he stretched, dropping the spent cigarette in the mug and nudging it further into the table, going back to his reclined pose.

"So, going to be nice and make me coffee too, or is it too much to ask for a few pleasantries at this late an hour?" He asked, a teasing lilt to his tone that showed he wasn't trying to be insubordinate - just cheeky.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Mon Mar 05, 2012 12:07 pm

Zack had been on a hunt to fill in his boredom, he had wandered most of the floors of the ShinRa building, but there was nothing to do while he had time off. He had pondered on annoying Aerith at the church but she hadn't been there. He was now on the way to the Turk lounge to see if Cissnei was in.

He pushed the door open looking inside. It was just Tseng and Reno.
"Hey have you guys seen-?" He began. Then stopped.
Zack was seeing the TURK lounge on the inside for the very first time and he had spotted the very flash looking coffee they had.

"Oh that is so not fair!" The SOLDIER lounge always had the shittiest brand of coffee, the cheapest, dirtiest tasting coffee.
He motioned at the coffee running into the room and picking up the packet.
"Why don't we get this stuff?!"
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Mon Mar 05, 2012 12:17 pm


Reno hardly had time to register Zack's presence before he had dashed in and almost grabbed the coffee from Tseng's hands. An involuntary twitch at that action was all Reno could muster, waiting for Tseng to beat the bouncing SOLDIER for touching him - let alone the coffee.

"We all chip in and pay for it, yo," he yawned, tapping out another cigarette and lighting it. "Can't be helped that we have... particular tastes and don't mind springing for it."

It didn't need to be said that the bag of fresh coffee that the two dark haired men had began the process of enjoying had actually come form Reno's pocket - he knew the truth and that was enough for him. Besides it made for good leverage when Tseng was at his worst.

"When you've stopped man-handling our coffee, can you prod the Director's nose and tell him that I want a mug too, and it's rude to make some without offering the other people in the room."

He didn't conceal his smirk - it was rare that any real ticking off would come with anyone else there to see it. Tseng's methods were rather... unconventional after all, and it's much easier to write up a fractured wrist as an accident rather than "He annoyed me. I hurt him. He deserved it" - which it would need to be with a witness who has no need to bend to Tseng's will.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Mon Mar 05, 2012 12:56 pm

Zack let go of the coffee and he waved his hand in front of Tseng's face.
"Hey Tseng... you in there?"

He tugged at the man's hair.
"Helllllloooo Gaia to Tseng."

*poke*

"Tseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeng." he bounced round the Turk and poked him in the arm and side hoping to get some form of reaction.
It was easy enough for him to get away with it. He wasn't under Turk jurisdiction.
Plus Zack had found on the few missions he went on with Tseng, there were so many different buttons he could push and get all kinds of interesting expression out of.
"I think he went on a mental vacation." Zack mused. "Is that normal?"
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Mon Mar 05, 2012 1:02 pm

Reno could do little more than stare in disbelief at what Zack was doing.

"No... when he's quiet... that's when you worry..." He managed to utter, almost frozen to the spot as he mentally tried to kick the "flight" response into action.

He was so going to get blamed for this....



((Crying with laughter at mental images... had to respond to it, sorry XD!!))
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Mon Mar 05, 2012 1:12 pm

"Really? Well he's pretty quiet now... should I be worried?" Zack asked poking Tseng in the cheek a couple of times.

He had heard the rumors about Tseng's temper, but he hadn't seen it first hand. He wondered if Tseng would lash out at him. That made him more curious as he poked the dot on Tseng's forehead next.



[lol hey the RP is tormenting Tseng, who better than a Zack Reno combo <3]
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Mar 07, 2012 3:32 am

Tseng's eye twitched just slightly once when the hyper-active puppy bounced in and took his coffee from him.. from HIM!
He twitched again when Zack waved his hand infront of Tseng's face.

Only Reno would've noticed the very slight movement of his hand that was reaching for his gun in the back of his pants, hand tightening around the handle.. when Zack finally poked him in the cheek the SOLIDER found himself nose to barrel with the Director's gun. "Five seconds.." was all he hissed in warning, oooh there was a promise of a very, VERY painful death in his eyes. Mentally wishing his katana was at hand right now.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Mar 07, 2012 3:44 am


Reno had stopped looking at Zack the second he went to prod Tseng's forehead, but from the corner of his eye he saw Tseng reach for his gun and was on his feet before his brain had time to stop him.

"Zack... move back slowly, hands where he can see them, yo," Reno advised, his tone adapting the soothing croon he only got when he was trying to stop someone getting personally acquainted with Tseng's gun. It was clear from the undertone lacing his words that he was being deathly serious.

Hands in clear sight he edged closer to Tseng, his eyes never leaving him. Zack wasn't important to watch, it was every micro-movement of the TURK that needed to be looked for.

"Tseng... Boss... Ain't a good idea to be shootin' the SOLDIER... you know what happened last time you beat the crap out of one'o Seph's men... General weren't too pleased. If you shoot one he'll be even more mad. And think of the paperwork - too much to be worried about at this time of night..."

... This was not how he envisioned his evening going either. Part of him had a sinking feeling that this was going to end with a bullet in himself or a very long hostage situation.

At the back of his mind he blamed it on the fact that Tseng didn't get laid often enough.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Mar 07, 2012 3:54 am

Eyes flicked to Reno for the briefest of moments, not taking his attention off of Zack. "Reno," he growled softly, "if you want to live, get me my sword." The deadly malice in his words were not to be mistaken for a joke.

His finger tightened on the trigger slightly. "The General can sort this mess out later, I do not care what he thinks and I'm sure he'd be secretly relieved to loose this hyper-active mess."
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:02 am

"Oooookay then..." Were the only words that came to him as he contemplated Tseng's words and what it was going to take to not have to explain to Seph why Zack was a little... holier than usual...


He stopped, hands still in the air, and certain there was no way to get the gun from Tseng without severe injury to at least two people... until a thought dawned on him.

"Sir, while I would love to comply with your order - I agree, the puppy drives us all mad, after all..." He shot a sheepish apology glance to Zack. "However, you keep your katana locked in the display cabinet to ensure the younger, and stupider, members of the company don't try to touch it and ruin the blade with fingerprints and the likes..."

Slowly one hand was extended out, palm up. "Could I have the key, please?"
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:12 am

Tseng blinked for a second as Reno caught him off guard with that statement, a very rare thing to do indeed. He sighed softly, rather annoyed at this. "You're a TURK aren't you? Pick the damn lock!" He snapped, eyes still not leaving the puppy.



((I'm so dying of laughter here it hurrrrrts XD))
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Mar 07, 2012 4:28 am

It was the split second that was enough for Reno to slide in and catch Tseng's lips with his own, mid sentence.

The shock should be enough for Tseng to loosen his grip on the gun and give Zack a fighting chance to get it from him and flick the safety on. If it wasn't....

"I could just fish it out of your po-" He purred, pausing as he knew the gun would swing in his direction if he continued that thought. He moved out of Tseng's reach very quickly, darting for the door, not even looking to see if Zack had taken the initiative to disarm Tseng. "Picking the lock it is. If you two would please wait here while I employ some skills I was told I'd get shot for using again... I will be with you as soon as the lock allows..."

The door was shut quickly, and Reno moved towards Tseng's office (and out of firearm range) with a quick step and a smug smirk. His thumb lightly brushed the corner of his mouth. "Always said he'd taste of chocolate and smoky coffee..."


While he had been told that picking a lock would have him rejoining the lifestream far ahead of schedule, it didn't mean he didn't carry his tools with him in any case. He rolled out the kit as he walked, selecting his tools to get through the first obstacle - the office door.

Reno pouted when it opened after only a few moments - it was hardly the challenge that it should have been. The pout worsened when the cabinet was just as simple.

"This just won't do," he grumbled, his bubble burst. "I wonder...." His eyes fell on the beautiful mahogany desk and it's undoubtedly locked drawers. They wandered then to the filing cabinet and the secret wall safe Tseng thought no one knew about, nestled behind a rather nice painting.

"You did give me permission, boss..." He grinned. "Oh, you're going to regret this..."
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Wed Mar 07, 2012 3:11 pm

Zack didn't even have time to utter a whoa when the gun was pulled on him and he rubbed behind his neck sheepishly.

Well he had expected Tseng to shoot him, he was thrown for six when Reno kissed Tseng. It was all he needed to disarm the Turk quickly and put the safety on and place it down the back of his belt before jumping away from Tseng.

"Um..." He could only grin sheepishly at Tseng. "So you are with it huh? Sorry I thought you were being a space cadet. I was just checking to see if you were home."

Zack looked on after where Reno had gone to get Tseng's sword. "So um does he do that often ya know with the uh... mouth and stuff." He didn't want to say kiss in case that got him in a world of more hurt.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 2:04 am

Tseng's attention was drawn back to Zack when the SOLIDER talked, then he noticed his gun was gone. "Damnit Reno!" He spat in a curse. "No, he's never done that before and when I see him again he won't live to try again." He muttered with a soft growl.

Taking a breath, Tseng regained his composure and held out his hand to Zack. "My gun."

Oh Tseng had plans for these two, painful plans. Reno first for that stunt.. how dare he do that to him?! Then Zack, the puppy wouldn't know what hit him when Tseng was through with him. Pain.. lots of pain and then maybe death, if he felt like it.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 5:33 am

Reno unashamedly emptied drawer after drawer onto the desk, replacing everything perfectly to where it needed to be for the shift of the drawer closing and opening to shuffle them back to where he'd found them.

So far his searches were all in vain - there was just no dirt to be dug on the Director that he could find - and that was with every accessible drawer, cupboard and filing cabinet turned out. There were of course the suggestive magazines, the bottles of alcohol, the fluffy handcuffs... the sock puppet theatre of ShinRa employees... Admittedly they were all things that Tseng had confiscated from him, so it was no surprise it was still under lock and key as the redhead was not beneath rummaging through the trash to retrieve it all.

The magazine was a little more dog-eared than he remembered it being, mind...

He had, however, noted a complete lack of Tseng's personnel files on the two of them - something that niggled in the back of Reno's mind as he took the watercolour from over the safe. If the two files were to be anywhere it was in there... and who knew what other treasures.

He shuffled himself closer to the safe, running his fingers over it as he ascertained which type of safe it was. If it was a fire safe then he was looking at an easier break... burglary safe and he was a little more buggered. It took little time for both logic and experience to tell him it was burglary safe - which intrigued him as most offices were more interested in fire, especially if it was hidden., as a burglary safe would essentially cook anything inside.

Whatever was in the safe he didn't want anyone getting to it even if the building burnt down around it.

His fingers ran deftly over the dial. It was a Group 1 - anything up to 6 numbers, and knowing Tseng it was the full 6. Six covered many things - birthdays for one were a simple answer to that... or it would be simple if anyone knew what Tseng's birthday was. This didn't deter him, though, and tried the date the ShinRa Company was founded... bust. Rufus' birthday... Nope. If it was neither the company of his direct superior's birthdays then it was going to be a little more complex.

He slowly turned the dial, listening for the tell-tale clicks that let him know how many wheels he was working with, and was unsurprised to gradually hear the sixth click. "You're a tad predictable, boss," he muttered, resetting the lock and then parking the wheels at zero.

Thankful for a brain that could visually graph out the results without the need for a piece of paper that would take the extra time he didn't have. It didn't take him long (after considerable training and practical use of the skill it would have been shocking if it did) to decipher the 6 digits: 0-1-1-9-19-87.

He'd expected a larger range of numbers than that, frowning as the numbers made some kind of sense in the back of his mind. After a pause he learnt back and looked at the safe with a frown. "You're fucking kidding me..." With trepidation he dialled his own birthday: 1-9 (19th), 1-0 (October), 19-87.

With that tell-tale click the wheels were locked into place and the door released. For now he was too baffled to pull the door open any more than he had. The rational part of his mind (also known as the "How to pretend something isn't what it might be" section) decided that Reno's own birthday was the last combination he was likely to try, and therefore the safest bet.

That explained it...

Slowly he pulled the heavy door open and ran his eyes over the contents, cataloguing where it was and therefore where to return it, before grabbing handfuls of files and heaving them onto the desk. The small wooden box with the kanji for "family" engraved on the top he left behind - there were some things he knew were best left alone, and he respected his boss enough to not delve there without permission (which he knew would never be granted).

He returned to the desk, flicking through paperwork that had no interest to him until nestled between it all was the inevitable find of his and Tseng's company profiles. The smirk was quick to return to his lips as he pulled Tseng's closer, making a note of his full name and birthday to make sure there were some interesting celebrations to go along with it.

He turned next to his own file, flicking it open and noting (somewhat impressed) that it actually had his full name (a rare occurrence), place of birth and his parents details filled in full. It was probably because they were important gang members, after all. He flicked past the test results, physical exams, medical reports and went straight to the boss' statement of his capabilities.

"... while his dishevelled and blasé mannerisms would lead a person to believe that the subject is incapable of doing his job, the opposite is in fact the truth - a skill to be taken advantage of when in the field. He behaves as though he is inattentive and of below average intelligence to hide a brilliant mind and photographic memory. It is my belief that should my position be available that Reno would be the perfect candidate to take my place - providing that someone finds a way to keep him in the office and understand the importance of paperwork."

He blinked a few times, surprised to have such a glowing report. Very surprised. Gawping, he shuffled through the rest of the folder until he came to a page where sheaves of photographs were contained in small plastic pouches. The frown was instantly back as he tugged them out and started shuffling through.

His jaw set as image after image was of himself - smoking, drinking, buying groceries... Either Tseng was stalking him or he was under investigation, and neither were particularly good prospects. A soft growl escaped him as there were shots of him and his ex boyfriend eating out, going clubbing, having a quiet drink.... and then his ex doing all the above with someone else.

"Fucking knew it," he snorted, flicking through the copious images. "Just... bastard. I knew something was going on... 'drifted apart' my perfectly sculpted ass..."
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 7:10 am

"Um... no." Zack stated and stepped back. "I like living thanks." he smiled at Tseng. "I can see that look in your eyes man and it does not bode well for me. I've heard Angeal's horror stories so yeah me and life... I kinda wanna keep it in one piece thanks."

Zack glanced to the door wondering what was taking Reno so long, he needed Tseng to get distracted again before he got- reprimanded. Tseng's way which by all recollection of stories from Kunsel was not in the least bit photogenic or pretty. Zack liked his face to remain the same and every other part of him that went with it, it was how he managed to lay on the charms to getting some, even when he couldn't pull a single date.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 9:33 am

Tseng lifted an eyebrow, it was very rare to for someone to tell him no, especially someone of lower ranking than himself. He took a step forward, calm yet dead eyes still focused on Zack. "What did you say to me?" He asked softly, taking another step toward Zack.

"You barge in here, into a private lounge, uninvited. Steal my coffee from my hands and proceed to make a mockery out of me in front of my second in command? And now you tell me no?!" He growled very dangerously, the promise of a painful death returning to his eyes.

What the hell is taking Reno so long? He thought in the back of his mind with a growl.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 9:39 am

Reno's eyes glanced to the cabinet and Tseng's katana, his fingers twitching. In less than five strides he had unsheathed the weapon, grabbed a handful of the photos and started for the door.

He kicked the Lounge door open, blade immediately pointing at Tseng, photos held up with the other hand.

"What the holy fuck are you doing stalking me?" He growled. "And it better be a damn good reason because I've memorised your personnel file and I will make sure every detail is posted all over the building."

He paused. "Oh, got it by the way," he said casually, thrusting the katana forward a little. "I figured you'd want it unsheathed to make the killing faster. Less things to get in the way of a little afternoon slaughter."
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 9:54 am

Tseng turned with a snap as the door was kicked open, that was twice now Reno had surprised him, three if you count the kiss.... which he didn't, thank you very much.

There was a blade pointed at him.. his blade, and photos... wait, photos? He frowned. "I do not believe I gave you permission to break into my safe, Reno." He stated, taking the katana and the photos.

Looking through the photos he remember when these were taken. "They are Rude's." He stated simply. "If you'll think about it, these were taken not long after you two were paired together and he wanted to know just what kind of person he was being teamed up with. I of course, confiscated them when I found out and kept them away from prying eyes.. such as yours."
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 9:59 am

"Seriously?" The look on Reno's face screamed just how much he wasn't believing Tseng. "So instead of destroying the photos you decided to put them in my official personnel file... why? So any future boss of mine knows that I happen to be bi-sexual, with a strong preference for men.. which is really not any of your business, yo, but I figured I ought to clear it up seeing there isn't a single picture of me with a woman... and people assume.

"Besides, you gave permission to pick your locks... you just didn't specify which ones to leave. Which reminds me - the combination to your safe is my birthday? And you're telling me you don't stalk me?"

He looked square in the eye waiting for that reasonable explanation.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 10:39 am

Zack looked from Reno to Tseng blinking then grinned.
"Oooooh I see now... in that case..." Zack took off quickly.

"BYE!" He was gone and down the hall before either could comment.

There was no way he was going to get involved in that little fiasco.
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 11:18 am

He had asked the first third class he had seen to pass on a message to a certain Zack Fair but it appeared that it had not gotten to him somewhere along the way. Fingers tapped at his desk impatiently as Sephiroth checked the time once more. Half an hour, certainly that was more than enough time for the other SOLDIER to be found. He had had enough of this waiting. He could be a very patient man, but not when he had certain needs.

Finally he had had enough. Despite the large stack of reports he needed to peruse his attention shifted to his phone. Reports could be handled later, there was something far more important. Calling up a number he quickly dialed it and waited for the other to pick up.

"Zack, my office. Now."
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PostSubject: Re: The Continuing Tormentation of Tseng [M]   Fri Mar 09, 2012 11:40 am

Zack had made it round the corner away from Tseng and Reno. It was awkward to say the least and he heard his phone ring and he picked up, but before he could say a thing, Sephiroth had demanded for him to come to his office.
Zack had hung up somewhat bewildered, Seph wounded pissed.

"Oh man what did I do now?" He sighed before running down the hall, one person you didn't keep waiting was Seph. Not if you valued your life. Sometimes more than often Seph cold be scarier than Tseng, the scary Tseng Zack had just witnessed for the first time.

Making it to Seph's office he burst through the door letting it click behind him.
"Sorry... you wanted to see me?" Instead of the normal salute Zack was trying to catch his breath and lent against the wall. He was probably safer with Seph if Tseng decided to chase him for the gun.
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